‘Obalende’, ‘Cms’ ‘Balende’,’Cmx’
I heard the conductor chanting beautifully the names of the bus stop I was headed.
I walked majestically into the bus followed by a resounding greeting from the conductor. Wow… that’s a first and this must be a good ride, saying to myself as i took my seat strategically by the window, third row to be precise which was my favorite sit whenever I take the bus so I can quietly ask the conductor for my change without been heard.
The conductor continued chanting beautifully and more people took their place in the bus and within a few minutes the bus was filled, and we were on our way to the destination.
The moment of truth came when I heard the conductor who seemed quite nice earlier asking for money.
‘Oya make una bring out your money o’, ‘Kosi change o’, ‘anybody wey give me big money I go join am o’
He continued to dish out his warnings.
Nawa o, isn’t this the same conductor that greeted me and made me feel welcomed. I then looked in my wallet only to find Alhaji Aliyu Mai-Bornu and Dr Clement Isong of the 1000 naira note both staring at me boldly in the face.
Hmmm…I don enter am saying to myself as i ransacked my bag quite sure there was one loose change hiding somewhere in the corner but all to no avail, when i immediately remembered Iya Bose the corn lady where I had exhausted my precious change.
Looking around, everyone seemed to be blessing the conductor with 500’s and 1000’s naira notes, we don enter today thinking to myself and thanking God I wasn’t the only one.
At this point all hope was lost turning to have a look at the faces of my fellow culprit hoping someone would instantly bring out that precious change that they were saving for later and everyone would scramble for it like hungry children, but no one showed that act of kindness. No one was patriotic enough to save us from the endless rant we were about to encounter from the conductor.
‘Make una continue’,
Said the conductor angrily snatching the powerful monies from everyone’s hand when almost instantly someone from the back shouted ‘Conductor my change’ AHHHH!… at that moment I didn’t want to be in that person shoes but thinking of it now, he probably didn’t feel like being generous that day, or perhaps that was his last money and he didn’t want to forget his change.
Well that was when all hell broke loose
‘Come remove the change from my Yansh now’ the conductor shouted
‘When I dey tell una make una bring change, una wan show say una papa dey work for CBN abi…’
He continued his endless rant.
All hope was lost at this point and knowing fully well these conductors would not let a dime go so i decided to take my fate in my own hands by keeping my mouth shut till I got to my destination and take whatever judgement the conductor handed to my fellow culprit and I as we have gone against the code 101 of taking the bus which was not having the exact amount for the ride.